Being Hinksch

No, I am not turning 50. In fact, this text has nothing to do with age. I'm actually here to talk about gauge. And maybe my poor rhyming skills. Someone recently told me that I should find a balance, and not be so intense. I don't remember exactly what they said, because it was in the middle of a somewhat heated discussion, but it was something along the lines of me being either 0 or 100. And what is right in the middle between 0 and 100? 42. No, wait. This the the answer to a different question. The number we are looking for here is 50. I am an intense person, with a strong personality. That's just who I am. I don't do it on purpose, I don't choose to be like that. It's my natural state, my default. Trust me, I wish I was less polarising. I think life would be easier for me. The husbear is chill and easygoing, and as a friend wisely said recently, does anyone ever really get upset with him? My intensity translate in the way I make friends. If I get to know some...

I once read one of those cheap self help books, and there was something along the lines of "sometimes you need to travel the whole world to realize what you want is right here, at home". I could never really relate to that: I left my small hometown in the middle of nowhere when I was 14 years old to move to a bigger city. It wasn't long until I realised not even my home country was enough for me. I left Brazil to Germany, Germany to the UK, and I'm still not sure this is the place I will be for the rest of my life. That feeling of always looking somewhere else stayed with me throughout my life, in every aspect of it, including the way I make friends. I have friends spread around the world, in different countries and timezones, and with time I became some sort of specialist in making and maintaining friendships far from home. It hasn't always been easy, there were some issues along the way, but they made me stronger and their lessons helped me build better friendsh...

Some days ago Yogi and I had a big argument. You see, we don't really fight a lot. We have a very peaceful relationship, mainly because we talk freely about everything, so things don't usually get to the point where they become an issue. And if they do, they would rarely become a fight. Besides, we are both averse to drama, stress, big scenes. If something becomes an issue, we talk it over and sort it out. Very rarely we have loud fights. This recent one was not a loud fight, but it was a serious argument about a deep issue. It was probably the closer we came to breaking up, at least from my side. In fact, there were only two other times where we came close to breaking up. I think this is a very good record for 11+ years together. I left the house halfway through the argument, because I needed to cool down and think about things. I don't walk away from an issue, but if I have stayed, I would have made decisions and acted in a way I did not want to, and I should not have. I ...